Cobra and Crackers

Watch out Hissing Sid, Sneaky Snake and serpent from the Garden of Eden. It's payback time!

Le Mat is a town just outside Hanoi where they specialize in exotic cuisines - particularly snake. Three of us caught a cab into town and we were soon joined by two motorcycle outriders banging on the windows and yelling at us. It turns out we weren't about to be robbed - the guys were just hawking for their competing snake restaurants. One of them escorted us to his establishment where we were ushered upstairs into an empty dinning room. Before we had even sat down a man appeared holding a sack, with something writhing inside...

Our snake emerges from it's sack. It was very pissed off, as you would be in the circumstances.


The creepy-looking proprietor with the long fingernails slits the snake's throat - insomuch as a snake isn't just one long throat. He drains the blood into glasses and the snake hisses its last as he cuts out the heart.


We began the meal with a snake blood and snake wine mixer, garnished with the heart which was still pumping away. Snake wine is made from rice vodka that has been marinading a dead snake. Bottoms up!


Mmmm, the snake heart slipped down so easily! I felt the snakepower begin to surge through my body!


Further courses included (starting clockwise from the bottom) snake gruel, grilled snake, sautéed snake, sautéed snake bits with citronella, soft fried snake skin and snake rolls. There was an accompaniment of snake fried rice, snake soup and crackers. There's a theme. Have you guessed what it is?


A very simple bill. Snackes, hear and beer. The perfect meal.


A big vat of snake wine. I'm glad my Mum and Dad stuck to crabapple wine in our airing cupboard at home.


This is where the poor little blighters live before the tasteless tourists and crazy locals turn up. I'll take the lively chap in hutch number 5 please!

Halong Bay

Three hours outside Hanoi in the Gulf of Tonkin lies spectacular Halong Bay, which looks exactly like Scaramanger's Island from The Man With the Golden Gun. Halong Bay has many more islands than the Bond location in Thailand (over 1500) but none were fitted with a Solex powered laser and sadly none were inhabited by Agent Goodnight.

Halong Bay is home to several floating villages. The villagers live by fishing and from fish farms built under their floating houses. They move the entire village to a protected location if there is a storm or typhoon.


Starting them early. Watch out Henley Regatta!


What a lot of old junk(s)!


All commerce is carried out afloat. A floating tuck shop visits our junk.


It was very hazy in the Bay but soon winter will bring think fog and mist and almost zero visibility.

Cyclusion

I'm done with cycling! I finished on the central Viet coast in a little nowhere town called Quang Ngai, with a round 1000 miles having rolled beneath the wheels. The bike and I traveled on separate trains north to Hanoi, me in AC soft sleeper, she in the luggage car of a local train. It took 24 hours of chugging north to reach Hanoi, capital of Vietnam where I have a week of saddle-free time before heading home.

Here's a map of the complete overland route. Biking is in red, trains in blue, bus in purple and boat in yellow.


View Larger Map

Central Vietnam

It's been wonderful cycling weather in Cambodia and Laos - the cool season is warm and dry with enough breeze to make it comfortable for long stretches in the saddle. All that changed as soon as I crossed into Vietnam which has only two seasons - summer monsoon and winter monsoon. My first full day in Vietnam comprised 11 hours cycling through drizzle and pouring rain. Memorable certainly. Some parts were even fun. I made a sorry sight standing in various hotel lobbies in Hué trying to find a room for the night.

There's a whole load of stuff to see in central, coastal Vietnam. Here are some highlights.

I interrupted some kids larking around riding water buffalo on the road between Hué and Da Nang. They didn't seem to mind.


I never discovered if this guy found anyone else to brush-joust with in Hué.


Ever wonder where Sir Giles Gilbert Scott got his inspiration from? Inside the citadel at Hué.


Self portrait on the long, winding pass between Hué and Da Nang.


And down the other side of the pass. I hoped this wasn't advance commentary on my downhill cycling.


This sprightly, cheerful old crone showed me around several shrines at the Marble Mountains. She was delightful.


This enormous cave in the Marble Mountains housed several shrines. It was deserted and amazingly atmospheric.


Hoi An is a beautiful place. Under a similar agreement to that which saved Oxford, Cambridge and Heidelberg during the Second World War, both sides spared Ho An in the American (Vietnam) War. It is a fabulously scenic place left just as it was in colonial times. There are few buildings more than 40 years old in the rest of Vietnam.


Hoi Anne harbour at sunset.


I decided to get my expedition beard shaved off and a haircut in Hoi An, since the cycling was coming to an end soon. Against my better judgment I was lured into this scarecut establishment by the silky, English phrases of the girls working there - "You! Haircut!" etc. A proper shave is usually a great value treat in developing countries, but this experience reinforced one of my traveling maxims - always get a dude to do the shaving. My nerve broke and I left this place still with half a moustache.


What's goin' on 'ear then? I've no eyed ear. Surgical earwax removal at a barbershop in Hoi An.


Cycling though the countryside is lovely, particularly on the quiet back roads. The paddy fields make a wonderful vista but rice cultivation never seems anything less than backbreaking, muddy work. There's little mechanisation to rice production in Vietnam.


Ca-phe Phin is the drink of choice for the long distance cyclist in Vietnam. Super-strength coffee is very slowly percolated onto condensed milk (see glass on the left). Ice (da) is added for a refreshing cold drink that gives you a double sugar and caffeine rush. Like Red Bull only tastier and prettier.

The Ho Chi Minh Trail

For a couple of days my cycle route followed parts of the Ho Chi Minh trail through Laos and Vietnam. The HCMT was the supply route that was used by North Vietnamese forces in what is known here as the American War. The countryside is mountainous and covered in dense forest and jungle. Dropping from one valley and climbing into another it was easy to see why the traffic along the multitude of trails proved impossible to stop.

I passed a series of former American military bases along what was once the DMZ, including Khe Sanh, site of the fiercest battle of the entire war. There's nothing much there now except some rusting helicopters and the old landing strip, on which nothing will grow. There's also a small museum full of propaganda which leaves you with the false impression that the North Vietnamese scored a famous victory. Pictures of smiling North Vietnamese girls carrying boxes of supplies are contrasted with photos of American soldiers "showing their terror" during the battle.

An American soldier apparently once said that "you could lose Khe Sanh and you'd really lost nothing at all". Standing in the drizzle in the mountains and jungle in middle of nowhere, I couldn't agree more.

There are still thousands of tons of unexploded ordinance 'UXO' all over Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. These signs are common in Vietnam and Laos. In Cambodia, people missing limbs are common.


This US tank is all that's left of a whole valley of destroyed and abandoned equipment near Ban Dong in Laos. It was part of an unsuccesful raid on the HCMT by South Vietnamese forces.


A smashed Chinook slowly rusts at Khe Sanh.


It's not all doom and gloom in the border area. In fact, if you didn't know any better, you'd think that Lao and Cambodians had been living in a peaceful, innocent idyll for the last few decades, always smiling and laughing. As I ride past, kids come running out of the stilt houses every few hundred yards and shout "sabadee!" and "goodbye!" (sometimes even "hello!"). It makes for constant entertainment.


Sunset approaching the Viet border from Laos on route 9.

Hostage to Hospitality

Savannaket is the kind of place it's great to travel to. There's nothing really to 'see' but it's a perfect town to wander the quiet streets, chat to people and generally hang out. I decided to stay a couple of days as a break from the bike.

For the second time in as many days I found myself hostage to Lao hospitality. Watching a game of petang I was soon adopted by Dr Two, a surgeon from the local hospital, and we began an all day petang-watching fest of drinking and eating. We started with rice whiskey spiced up with goat gonads and moved on to eat the 'nads themselves. As a result I am assured I will become a "very strong man".

We traveled across town from one petang venue to another, finishing at the 'stadium' for an all day knockout competition. Petang seems to be identical to French boule, but I'm no expert. The guys in Savannaket certainly were though, and the competition was enthralling. My team pick from the first round was defeated in the final, an absorbing game. It was all toped off with much Beerlao and backslapping. An unexpected and great day.

Kids on the street outside the local Wat. This is about as busy as it gets in Savannaket.


The town has a blend of dilapidated French colonial architecture and Laos laid-back-ness that is common to Laos - and Cambodia.


Dr Two and the author. He doesn't look all that pleased in this picture but he soon picked up after a few glasses of goat whiskey and Beerlao.


There was much discussion, advice and measurement on the field, here at our first petang venue behind the bus shelter.


It was Lao National Day and so there were spectators aplenty wherever we went.


The final was played under floodlights at the local 'stadium'. The dude in the blue shirt is a virtuoso and now town champion. Destined for the national team I was told, and after watching his game I can believe it.